


The Anti-Santa Agenda

by izukillme



Series: HyuuIzu Christmas Drabbles [6]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: "you're an idiot" "yeah but i'm your idiot ;))))))", Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Hyuuga is so done, Izuki is anti-santa, M/M, santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:14:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21954955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/izukillme/pseuds/izukillme
Summary: Izuki has an anti-Santa agenda. Hyuuga is forced to listen.
Relationships: Hyuuga Junpei & Izuki Shun, Hyuuga Junpei/Izuki Shun
Series: HyuuIzu Christmas Drabbles [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1580473
Kudos: 4





	The Anti-Santa Agenda

“I’m planning an anti-Santa agenda,” Izuki declares one fine morning, flopping down into his boyfriend’s lap. Hyuuga doesn’t bother to look up from the show he’s watching – a new episode of Naruto just came out, shut up – too used to Izuki’s antics around this time of year.

“’Tis the season to be jolly, my ass,” mutters Izuki into Hyuuga’s shoulder. “’Tis more like the season to grab cash from the unsuspecting middle class in the name of ‘holiday spirit’.”

“Remind me again,” Hyuuga says lazily, “why do you hate Christmas so much?”

“Well,” Izuki begins, ever ready to go full SWAT on Christmas, “first of all, it’s a fucking _myth_! Kids actually _believe_ in Santa and then their hearts get broken when they realise that he doesn’t exist! That’s just cruel, come on.”

“True,” Hyuuga agrees noncommittally, continuing to watch his video.

Izuki goes on railing, “Secondly, it’s a sham. A complete scam, so people will spend more and rich people can get richer. It’s _capitalism_ , Junpei.”

Sometimes Hyuuga regrets Izuki having gone to a foreign college. He’d learnt too many big words there.

“Yeah, sure.” he hums before Izuki can punch him in the groin for not responding.

“Thirdly,” Izuki continues, with a pleased smile that Hyuuga is actually listening to him for once, “it’s so overrated. What’s really so fun about Christmas? I mean, think about it. The magic, the special feeling; it’s all in the head. I could get up feeling magical and special every day if I wanted.”

“Mm-hmm.”

“I’m going to make pamphlets and put them out over the city. ‘Santa Isn’t Real – It’s All a Lie’, they’ll be called. Kids deserve to know the truth, Junpei. We can’t keep pulling the wool over their eyes.”

“Right.” Hyuuga says absently.

“I am a blue sheep.”

“Absolutely – wait, what?”

Izuki narrows his eyes at him. “Were you even listening to me?”

“Yes?” Hyuuga peeks meekly at his boyfriend, who merely rolls his eyes. Izuki does that a lot nowadays.

“Dumbass. Of course you weren’t.” He stretches lazily, too lethargic to get up off Hyuuga’s lap – but not too lethargic to throw the Santa hat draped over the sofa in his boyfriend’s face.

“Ow!” Hyuuga complains. Izuki grins.

“If you don’t want to get hit in the face next time, then _listen_ when I’m planning an anti-Santa agenda,” he says all too cheerfully.

Hyuuga groans. _God_ , his boyfriend is an idiot.

“I’m your idiot,” Izuki says with a shit-eating grin, having known exactly what he was thinking, and to be honest? Hyuuga has to agree.

Izuki _is_ his idiot. And he’ll be damned if he lets anyone else have him.

**Author's Note:**

> WOOO HALFWAY THROUGH I'M STARTING TO THINK WE CAN DO THIS BITCHES


End file.
